Monday, April 03, 2006

I Can't Forgive Myself

I was in a chat when a young woman mentioned that she'd had an abortion years ago and knew that God had forgiven her, but she couldn't forgive herself. She asked for advice on what she should do. By clicking here, you'll be linked to a site designed especially for parents who've made this decision, for free counseling.

Folks, abortion hurts more than the baby. The guilt is so heavy on the parents who make this decision, sometimes retroactively but it comes nevertheless, that they cannot accept the ultimate decision for forgiveness. If you are considering ending a pregnancy, consider this woman's story and think again.

The value of a child cannot be measured in dollars and investment, in trouble and payoff, they're worth is measured in potential and joy. The work invested in them is its own reward. Like any relationship, just being near them and interacting with them is amazingly joyful. Every child lost to abortion is harmful on so many levels. To society, we've lost another wage earner who would contribute to the economy and to the support of their elders through the Social Security programs not to mention the potential Einstiens and Tchaikovskys. To the community, we've lost a contributor to local culture and support structure. To the family, we've lost a daughter/son, sister/brother and continuing blood line. To the parent, we've lost the most precious loving hearts.

When you look at a little child and think, his/her mother could have decided they were not prepared for the task of parenting and just "got rid of it." what goes through your mind and heart. No big deal? When you look at a man or woman who've contributed to society for decades, can you think, they should have been aborted? According to the scriptures, this thought is equivalent to murder. Why isn't actual abortion considered murder? Because some men decided that a fetus is not a person and so has no rights? No, because too many people are ignorant of the facts, of the pain and guilt that follows, of the cost to society, and of the lost talent that advance knowledge, contibute to the arts, or lead us through evil times. God makes known his heart on this issue by giving us a conscience. And conscience is a terrible punisher for wilfully rebelling against God.

I know this kind of guilt though not through this kind of act. I worked through it by a Christian brother's advice to me, "If you were the only sinner on earth, God would have done that work on the cross for you alone. If God considers you valuable enough to send His Son to die on a cross to save you, and He has decided to forgive you, who are you to overrule His decision. Do not consider your judgment concerning your worth more valid than God's judgment of your worth.

I don't know how unbelievers deal with this kind of guilt. Its too overwhelming to work through without God to overrule my self disgust, and self loathing.

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